Men and Christmas Presents
by Kim Leady
There I was shuffling my filing system around on my desk (piles here, stacks there) looking for my Christmas shopping list when I uncovered my calendar. And what did I find staring at me? A big red circle! A bull’s eye marking December 25th. Gee, what a nice reminder…not!
I knew my time was running out. I didn’t need this pressure. Days were flying by as fast as chads were falling off of ballots down in Florida.
Finally, remembering where I had hid the list so neither my sons nor their father would find it; I pulled it out from underneath a stack of books. I smiled at my clever hiding place and let out a sigh. Things were going to be okay. Now I was ready to take on the malls, the stores, and anything else I had to conquer to achieve my goal – obtaining all the items on my list before my guys were done deer hunting the next day. No problem. What could possibly go wrong? I had a plan in my head and a list in my hand.
Sometimes I can be sooo wrong.
The morning went as planned. The guy’s gear (packs, gadgets, guns, and food) was pushed out the front door followed by their sleepy owners at five. I grabbed a shower and was on the road by seven and in Brentwood by eight. The weather was even on my side. It was cold and the sky looked like it might flurry. I am one of these people some might view as warped, because I prefer to Christmas shop when the mercury is below forty. And to have snow flying in the air is like hitting the lottery. Which is why I might put off shopping until there is a nip in the air, but I would never wait around for snow. Especially, since most years we don’t even see the white stuff until January.
My first stop - R.E.I. – an outdoor equipment store filled with everything an outdoor enthusiast could possible dream of. And since I had three in my house, this was where Santa was starting. Of course, I just happened to stumble in on the day they were having their special annual sale. So to say I had plenty of company is an understatement. Anybody and everybody who had ever used a paddle, slipped on a pair of hiking boots, pitched a tent or biked a mile was there sifting through the sale bins.
But I wasn’t going to let this dampen my spirits. I had a mission. I knew this place carried something my husband wanted. And nobody was going to stand in my way of getting the first item on my list…a backpack. Steve and I had been here just a few weeks prior and he’d shown me this pack he wanted to get for our next adventure. And as I snatched it off the rack, I noticed it was still on sale. Perfect! He would never guess this present. Never! Life was good.
I left the store carrying my large package, humming White Christmas. The next few hours went as planned and I arrived home with time to spare to hide my goodies before the guys returned from their hunting.
After I had wrapped and stashed the boys’ gifts, I turned my attention to Steve’s backpack. I had run out of wrapping paper, so I was going to have to hide it until I had time to replenish my supplies. I looked around the house and then finally decided to hide it in one of my dresser drawers, the bottom one to be exact. He would never look through my clothes. It was a perfect hiding place.
Well, everything was going according to plan, until several days later when Steve went to look for a particular shirt of his.
Not only did one miracle happen while looking for his shirt, but two! After probing his closet for this plain white T-shirt, he decided I must have it and he began to search my dresser drawers. Now, why he just didn’t ask me if I had it is beyond me. Any other time he would have. But nooo, this time of all times, he sets out to find it himself. That was miracle one.
The second miracle was his searching technique. I’m not sure if it’s a guy thing or if it just runs in my family, but my men are not good at finding things they’re looking for. It’s not that they don’t have a brain. Far from it, they’re extremely intelligent. However, when they go looking for something they never lift things or move things. Never! That was until he started looking for that shirt.
Not only did he open my dresser drawers, but he also pulled out my clothes that were concealing his present. I guess I better never gamble because I would have bet anything my husband would’ve had a better chance at getting struck by lightening than to find his one and only Christmas present.
So, you want to take a guess what I’ll be doing along with several thousand other people on Christmas Eve? That’s right! Because my husband is a wonderful man, I’ll be shopping for him trying to find, yet another, perfect gift. Something he wants but he’ll never expect under the tree, all because he went looking for a shirt.
From our home to yours, Happy Holidays and Happy New Year.
Kim
And hopefully it still has the lable on it so I know who it was supposed to go to.
